You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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