There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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