Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
