I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
