But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I don't deserve a penis
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
