I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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