Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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