question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
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