Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
She just used a chaser for red wine.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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