There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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