so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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