Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(561): View more from Florida

We're facebook friends in real life

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(440): View more from Ohio

And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link

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(254): View more from Texas

his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker

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(914): View more from New York

Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME

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(515): View more from Iowa

Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.

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(302): View more from Delaware

Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.

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(703): View more from Virginia

Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'

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