after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
