So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
Randomize
