I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
Randomize
