i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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