After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
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