We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
