so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Randomize
