If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
