i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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