Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Randomize
