Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize