So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
