dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
honey bunches of taint.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Randomize
