Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Randomize
