were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I think I just sharted jello shots
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