And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
