Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
