You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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