where am i from again
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
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