I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Randomize
