I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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