does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Randomize
