Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
