I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Randomize
