What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
