He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
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