Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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