I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Randomize
