She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Randomize
