Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
You pole danced in your parka.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
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