I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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