I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
