You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Randomize