Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
