Who did Billy Mays play for?
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
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