Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
We need to feng shui this bitch.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
