I hate all girls vehemently.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
