His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
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