I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Randomize
